幽默英語小故事，儘量短一點

幽默英語小故事，儘量短一點

The Old Cat
An old woman had acat.Thecat was very old；she could not run quickly，and she could not bite，because she was soold.Oneday the old cat saw a mouse；she jumped and caught themouse.Butshe could not bite it；so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away，because the cat could not bite it.
Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed themouse.Shebegan to hit thecat.Thecat said，“Do not hit your old servant.I have worked for you for many years，and I would work for you still，but I am tooold.Donot be unkind to the old，but remember what good work the old did when they were young.“
【譯文】
老猫
一比特老婦有只猫，這只猫很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了東西，因為它年紀太大了.一天，老猫發現一隻老鼠，它跳過去抓這只老鼠，然而，它咬不住這只老鼠.囙此，老鼠從它的嘴邊溜掉了，因為老猫咬不了它.
於是，老婦很生氣，因為老猫沒有把老鼠咬死.她開始打這只猫，猫說：“不要打你的老僕人，我已經為你服務了很多年，而且還願意為你效勞，但是，我實在太老了，對年紀大的不要這麼無情，要記住老年人在年青時所做過的有益的事情.”
A man was going to the house of some richperson.Ashe went along the road，he saw a box of good apples at the side of theroad.Hesaid，“I do not want to eat those apples；for the rich man will give me much food；he will give me very nice food to eat.”Then he took the apples and threw them away into the dust.
He went on and came to ariver.Theriver had become very big；so he could not go overit.Hewaited for some time；then he said，“I cannot go to the rich man's house today，for I cannot get over the river.”
He began to gohome.Hehad eaten no food thatday.Hebegan to wantfood.Hecame to the apples，and he was glad to take them out of the dust and eat them.
Do not throw good things away；you may be glad to have them at some other time.
【譯文】
一個人正朝著一個富人的房子走去，當他沿著路走時，在路的一邊他發現一箱好蘋果，他說：“我不打算吃那些蘋果，因為富人會給我更多的食物，他會給我很好吃的東西.”然後他拿起蘋果，一把扔到土裏去.
他繼續走，來到河邊，河漲水了，囙此，他到不了河對岸，他等了一會兒，然後他說：“今天我去不了富人家了，因為我不能渡過河.”
他開始回家，那天他沒有吃東西.他就開始去找吃的，他找到蘋果，很高興地把它們從塵土中翻出來吃了.
不要把好東西扔掉，換個時候你會覺得它們大有用處.
The City Mouse and the Country Mouse
Once there were twomice.Theywerefriends.Onemouse lived in the country；the other mouse lived in thecity.Aftermany years the Country mouse saw the City mouse；he said，“Do come and see me at my house in the country.”So the City mousewent.TheCity mouse said，“This food is not good，and your house is notgood.Whydo you live in a hole in the field？You should come and live in thecity.Youwould live in a nice house made ofstone.Youwould have nice food toeat.Youmust come and see me at my house in the city.“
The Country mouse went to the house of the Citymouse.Itwas a very goodhouse.Nicefood was set ready for them toeat.Butjust as they began to eat they heard a greatnoise.TheCity mouse cried，“Run！Run！The cat is coming！”They ran away quickly and hid.
After some time they cameout.Whenthey came out，the Country mouse said，“I do not like living in the city.I like living in my hole in thefield.Forit is nicer to be poor and happy，than to be rich and afraid.“
【譯文】
城裡老鼠和鄉下老鼠
從前，有兩隻老鼠，它們是好朋友.一隻老鼠居住在鄉村，另一隻住在城裡.很多年以後，鄉下老鼠碰到城裡老鼠，它說：“你一定要來我鄉下的家看看.”於是，城裡老鼠就去了.鄉下老鼠領著它到了一塊田地上它自己的家裡.它把所有最精美食物都找出來給城裡老鼠.城裡老鼠說：“這東西不好吃，你的家也不好，你為什麼住在田野的地洞裏呢？你應該搬到城裡去住，你能住上用石頭造的漂亮房子，還會吃上美味佳餚，你應該到我城裡的家看看.”
鄉下老鼠就到城裡老鼠的家去.房子十分漂亮，好吃的東西也為他們擺好了.可是正當他們要開始吃的時候，聽見很大的一陣響聲，城裡的老鼠叫喊起來：“快跑！快跑！猫來了！”他們飛快地跑開躲藏起來.
過了一會兒，他們出來了.當他們出來時，鄉下老鼠說：“我不喜歡住在城裡，我喜歡住在田野我的洞裏.因為這樣雖然貧窮但是快樂自在，比起雖然富有卻要過著提心吊膽的生活來說，要好些.

幽默英語小故事3篇
2天之內回答，要2分鐘左右，一定要幽默哦！
有5到6個難詞，好笑一點！

Big Head
“All the kids make fun of me”the boy cried to his mother.“They say I have a big head”
“Don't listen to them.”his mother comforted him.“You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes”
“Where's the shopping bag？”
“I haven't got one，use your hat.”
大腦袋
“所有的孩子都拿我開玩笑，”小男孩哭著跟媽媽說：“他們說我長了一個大腦袋.”
“別聽他們的，”他媽媽安慰說：“你的腦袋長得很漂亮.好了，別哭了，去商店買10磅洋芋來.”
“購物袋在哪？”
“我沒有購物袋，就用你的帽子吧.”
Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.“What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday？”
“I gave it to a poor old woman，”he answered.
“You're a good boy，”said the mother proudly.“Here are two centsmore.Butwhy are you so interested in the old woman？“
“She is the one who sells the candy.”
好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢.
“昨天給你的錢幹什麼了？”
“我給了一個可憐的老太婆，”他回答說.“你真是個好孩子，”媽媽驕傲地說.“再給你兩分錢.可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？”
“她是個賣糖果的.”
Where is the father？
Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
“Look，”said the elder brother.“How nice these paintings are！”
“Yes，”said the younger，“but in all these paintings there is only the mother and thechildren.Whereis the father？“
The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained，“Obviously he was painting the pictures.”
父親在哪兒？
兄弟倆在看一些漂亮的油畫.
“看，”哥哥說，“這些畫多漂亮呀！”
“是啊，”弟弟說道，“可是在所有這些畫中，只有媽媽和孩子.那爸爸去哪兒了呢？”
哥哥想了會兒，然後解釋道：“很明顯，他當時正在畫這些畫唄.”
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked，“What happened？”“A kid bit me，”replied Ivan.“Would you recognize him if you saw him again？”asked his mother.“I'd know him any where，”said Ivan.“I have his ear in my pocket.”
他的耳朵在我衣兜裏、
伊凡鼻子流著血回到家裡.他媽媽問，“發生了什麼事？”“一個男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡說.“再見到他你能認出來嗎？”媽媽問.“他走到哪裡我都能認出他，”伊凡說.“他的耳朵還在我衣兜裏呢？
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without anycheese.Thelittle boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest'splate.Thevisitor smiled，put the cheese into his mouth and then said:“You must have better eyes than your mother，sonny.Wheredidyou find the cheese？“”In the rat-trap，sir，“replied theboy.
由於客人在吃蘋果餡餅時，家裡沒有起司了，於是女主人向大家表示歉意.這家的小男孩悄悄地離開了屋子.過了一會兒，他拿著一片起司回到房間，把起司放在客人的盤子裏.客人微笑著把起司放進嘴裡說：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你媽媽的好.你在哪裡找到的起司？”“在捕鼠夾上，先生.”那小男孩說

幽默英語小故事
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Big Head“All the kids make fun of me”the boy cried to his mother.“They say I have a big head”“Don't listen to them.”his mother comforted him.“You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go t…