Humorous English story, try to be short

Humorous English story, try to be short

The Old Cat
An old woman had a cat.The cat was very old; she could not run quickly,and she could not bite,because she was so old.One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse.But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away,because the cat could not bite it.
Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse.She began to hit the cat.The cat said,"Do not hit your old servant.I have worked for you for many years,and I would work for you still,but I am too old.Do not be unkind to the old,but remember what good work the old did when they were young."
[translation]
Old cat
An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old. It couldn't run fast and bite because it was too old. One day, the old cat found a mouse. It jumped to catch the mouse. However, it couldn't bite the mouse. So the mouse ran away from its mouth because the old cat couldn't bite it
So the old woman was very angry because the old cat didn't kill the mouse. She began to beat the cat. The cat said, "don't beat your old servant. I've been serving you for many years and I'm willing to serve you. But I'm too old. Don't be so cruel to the old. Remember the useful things that the old people did when they were young."
A man was going to the house of some rich person.As he went along the road,he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road.He said,"I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat." Then he took the apples and threw them away into the dust.
He went on and came to a river.The river had become very big; so he could not go over it.He waited for some time; then he said,"I cannot go to the rich man's house today,for I cannot get over the river."
He began to go home.He had eaten no food that day.He began to want food.He came to the apples,and he was glad to take them out of the dust and eat them.
Do not throw good things away; you may be glad to have them at some other time.
[translation]
A man was walking towards a rich man's house. When he walked along the road, he found a box of good apples on one side of the road. He said, "I'm not going to eat those apples, because the rich man will give me more food and he will give me something delicious." then he picked up the apples and threw them into the soil
He went on and came to the river. The river was full, so he couldn't get to the other side of the river. He waited for a while, and then he said, "today I can't go to the rich man's house, because I can't cross the river."
He began to go home. He didn't eat that day. He began to look for food. He found apples and happily turned them out of the dust to eat
Don't throw away good things. You'll find them useful at another time
The City Mouse and the Country Mouse
Once there were two mice.They were friends.One mouse lived in the country; the other mouse lived in the city.After many years the Country mouse saw the City mouse; he said,"Do come and see me at my house in the country." So the City mouse went.The City mouse said,"This food is not good, and your house is not good.Why do you live in a hole in the field?You should come and live in the city.You would live in a nice house made of stone.You would have nice food to eat.You must come and see me at my house in the city."
The Country mouse went to the house of the City mouse.It was a very good house.Nice food was set ready for them to eat.But just as they began to eat they heard a great noise.The City mouse cried," Run!Run!The cat is coming!" They ran away quickly and hid.
After some time they came out.When they came out,the Country mouse said,"I do not like living in the city.I like living in my hole in the field.For it is nicer to be poor and happy,than to be rich and afraid."
[translation]
City mouse and country mouse
Once upon a time, there were two mice. They were good friends. One mouse lived in the country and the other lived in the city. Many years later, the country mouse met the city mouse and said, "you must come to my home in the country.", The city mouse went. The country mouse led him to his own home in a field. He found out all the best food for the city mouse. The city mouse said, "this food is not delicious, and your home is not good. Why do you live in a cave in the field? You should move to the city. You can live in a beautiful house made of stone and eat delicious food, You should visit my home in town. '
The country mouse went to the house of the city mouse. The house was very beautiful, and the delicious food was arranged for them. But just as they were about to eat, they heard a loud noise, and the city mouse cried, "run! Run! The cat is coming!" they ran away quickly and hid
After a while, they came out. When they came out, the country mouse said, "I don't like to live in the city. I like to live in my hole in the field. Because it's better to be happy and free though poor than to live in fear though rich

3 humorous English stories
It takes about 2 minutes to answer in 2 days. Be humorous!
There are five to six difficult words, funny!

Big Head
“All the kids make fun of me”the boy cried to his mother.“They say I have a big head”
“Don't listen to them.”his mother comforted him.“You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes”
“Where's the shopping bag?”
“I haven't got one,use your hat.”
Big head
"All the children make fun of me," the little boy cried to his mother. "They say I have a big head."
"Don't listen to them," his mother comforted. "You have a beautiful head. Well, don't cry. Go to the store and buy 10 pounds of potatoes."
"Where is the shopping bag?"
"I don't have a shopping bag, just use your hat."
Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents."What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly."Here are two cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
Good boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents
"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he replied. "You're such a good child," his mother said proudly. "I'll give you two cents more. But why are you so interested in that old lady?"
"She's a candy seller."
Where is the father?
Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
"Look," said the elder brother."How nice these paintings are!"
"Yes," said the younger,"but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children.Where is the father?"
The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained,"Obviously he was painting the pictures."
Where's father?
The brothers are looking at some beautiful paintings
"Look," said the elder brother, "how beautiful these paintings are
"Yes," said the younger brother, "but in all these paintings, only the mother and the child. Where's the father?"
The elder brother thought for a while, and then explained, "obviously, he was painting these paintings at that time."
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,"What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan."Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother."I'd know him any where," said Ivan."I have his ear in my pocket."
His ears are in my pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose. His mother asked, "what happened?" "a boy bit me," Ivan said. "Can you recognize him when you see him again?" his mother asked. "I can recognize him wherever he goes," Ivan said. "His ears are still in my pocket?
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese.The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.The visitor smiled,put the cheese into his mouth and then said:"You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny.Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap,sir," replied theboy.
The little boy left the room quietly. After a while, he came back to the room with a piece of cheese and put it on the guest's plate. The guest put the cheese in his mouth with a smile and said, "boy, Your eyes are better than your mother's. where did you find the cheese? "" on the mousetrap, sir, "said the little boy

Humorous English stories
For an English humorous story, with translation!

Big Head“All the kids make fun of me”the boy cried to his mother.“They say I have a big head”“Don't listen to them.”his mother comforted him.“You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go t...